The Malignant Narcissist Uses Force To Make Her Victim Submit To Abuse

Forcing Submission

by

Anna Valerious of Narcissists Suck Blog

Every abuser, every narcissist, every psychopath, every rapist, arsonist, every sociopath is after one thing: POWER. Power over others. This is an outgrowth of the narcissistic need to have all attention focused on them. We already understand that attention is the drug that the narcissist pursues at every moment. This is the core motivation that moves them. There are natural branches that sprout off this trunk and the desire for power over others is one of them. The intoxicating thrill of absolute power is the biggest high they can get from their drug of choice.

The extent to which an individual will pursue their quest for power is determined only by what they feel they can get away with. No small part of this is how much they fear authority or the law. The narcissist mother will not pursue absolute power to the degree that the psychopathic serial killer will. But make no mistake – both are consumed by the quest for power over others.

[ Indeed, many malignant narcissists will feign victimhood, manipulate authorities and exploit the law in an effort to “force” the true victim to submit. In these instances, “law enforcement professionals” become an instrument of harassment for the abuser. They are serving the malignant narcissist abuser; they are helping her to abuse and get away with it. And what they are doing is very wrong, and very damaging to an already abused victim.]

Unchecked pursuit of power is destructive and merciless as well as escalating. As Proverbs 27:20 says in the Contemporary English Version, “Death and the grave are never satisfied, and neither are we.” The grave never protests when someone dies, “We’re full up here. We aren’t accepting any more death, sorry.” Death is always ready to open up her insatiable arms for yet another. So is the lust that drives the malignant narcissist of all brands and stripes. Never satisfied. Never Satiated. Never full.

[ Ain’t that the truth. The malignant narcissist is a big black hole and she is NEVER full. NEVER satisfied. She’s always in pursuit of more and more and more. The more is handed to her, the more she craves. In terms of power; “unchecked” and “escalating” are key words here. Let’s say a malignant narcissist is power of attorney for 12 years over a defenseless old man (her father). She uses that old man and his money to abuse, harass and aggress her victim (her sister), and then he dies. What then? The malignant narcissist tyrant has been on a reign of terror for over a decade, possibly her whole life, and no one has ever put a stop to her. She has never faced any consequences for her corruption. As a result, her lust for power has grown to grotesque proportions. She’s not about to relinquish any “power” just because her main weapon (her father) died. She is not only going to pursue continual power at all costs, she will attempt to trump her last power position. In other words, she is going to take her pathological need for “power and control” over her victim to the next level. She is going to take her position as tyrant within a dysfunction family and force her will on the outside world – the community. This is where “authorities” and the “law” come in. She knows they occupy a powerful position in society and she wants a piece of that power. So, in the same way she used her wealthy old father and his financial position, she uses the police and the legal system as a weapon to abuse her victim. What the hell comes after that?! The reality is, the malignant narcissist is drunk with power and her intimidation and control tactics only escalates with time and opportunity. Unless of course, someone puts a stop to her and sues her and her cohorts for something like "Malicious Prosecution".]

Kathy Krajco defined what absolute power looks like:

What is absolute power? It’s absolute control, possession. Surely you have recognized the lust for it in bizarre crimes committed by psychopaths. Mike DeBardeleben, a sexual sadist serving a life sentence wrote in his journal that it is “to force her to undergo suffering without being able to defend herself.”

“Without being able to defend herself” are key words. It isn’t enough to torment the victim: this must be done in a way that keeps her from resisting. That’s absolute power, possession…

This is the ultimate in mental cruelty = making the victim bend over for it. Then the sick-o gets to pretend that the victim truly does “want it,” has ceased to exist as a person (with a free will and the most basic human right – the right to self defense) and is but an appendage of his that he thus “proves” his absolute power over.

All narcissists do this one way or another: they don’t merely abuse, they FORCE SUBMISSION TO ABUSE. This makes them God, whose punishing wounds we are to shamefully accept as our fault. We are not to resist: we are simply to hang our heads as deserving of them… “What Makes Narcissists Tick” pgs. 104 – 105

Notice that what is required for this to work is for the narcissist to completely disarm their victim. No right to self-defense allowed! This is what they must strip you of first before they can go on to pretend that you are submitting to them of your own free will. Like they deserve such submission and like you’ve freely given it. Either they will use psychological tactics to get you to feel you have no right to defend yourself, or, as in the case of the serial killer, they will arrange your physical circumstances to make it impossible for you to defend yourself and then break you down mentally.

[ Other malignant narcissists who are adept at playing the victim and utilizing the pity-ploy, will manipulate authorities and the system in order to make it a crime for the victim to confront her abusers, or to show any resistance to abuse. For example, the malignant narcissist can get away with psychologically aggressing her victim and committing fraud and stealing, but the victim isn’t allowed to express any anger over these unrelenting attacks and personal violations. In fact, the victim’s reaction to the narcissist's malice is called into question, NOT the malignant narcissist's predatory and morally repugnant criminal behavior. In the end, the victim’s emotional distress at being a target of exploitation, abuse and high stakes theft is labeled a crime.]

So, for the sake of the victim’s mental health, you must NEVER deny him or her the right to put up a fight.

Denying a person under any kind of assault this right is what theologians call the sin of “extreme perversity,” otherwise known as the Sin of Sodom, which is a certain kind of rape – RAPE, not sex – is symbolic.

It violates the laws of nature and the innate instinct for self-preservation. If the victim knuckles under to pseudo-moralistic pressure to not lift hand or voice in self defense, he or she will become a suicide risk. That is forcing people to commit the worst breach of faith there is – with one’s very self. It’s self-betrayal, what Joan of Arc called the “most wretched treason.”

The victim NEEDS to know that he or she did what they could to resist their abuser! Don’t EVER try to stop the victim from doing that!

NEVER, never, never preach prime-time morality at the victim making it a sin for him or her to yell at the abuser. Though yelling may not be wise in all cases, it IS the victim’s RIGHT! It at least lets him or her preserve self-respect through showing a back bone. --- “Self Preservation Under Narcissistic Abuse” by Kathy Krajco.

I made a point in this post that your most fundamental right as a living being is the right to self-defense. It is this very right which the narcissist will first try to convince you that you don’t have.

“Turn the other cheek” is the pious phrasing far too many victims of abusers have gotten as advice when they desperately have sought for help with their situation. It is essential that victims of narcissists are re-armed with the knowledge of their right to self-defense if they are ever going to be able to resist and break the narcissist’s power over them.

Knowing that the narcissist is driven by their need for power over others, and knowing they are always in search of this headiest drug which is absolute power over others, then you’ll be aware that they must force your submission in order to feel powerful over you.

All this leads straight to the fact that a narcissist must deprive you of your right to defend yourself to accomplish this. THEY WILL ALWAYS DO THIS BY FRAUD, LIES AND THREATS. They will bring in their proxies to help them get you to submit to that which no one should ever have to submit to.

They want to pretend that your forced submission is a real submission… and this can only be done if they successfully deprive you of your ability to defend yourself.

Can you see how incredibly important it is to be fully aware of your right to NOT submit to abuse? I am convinced that no one breaks free of the power of a narcissist over them until they are able to claim for themselves the right to self-defense.

It is important to mention here one very tricky sleight-of-hand that a narcissist does to disarm someone from self-defense. This is accomplished by intentionally mislabeling your defensive behaviors as being “retribution” or “vengeance”. They accuse you of hurting THEM. They pretend to know your motives and lay the accusation that any efforts you make to defend yourself are actually coming from your desire to hurt THEM.

If they can convince you that you are being vengeful, or at least if they can convince you that others see you as being vengeful, then they can shut you down. Force your submission once again.  

"It's another form of Blame the Victim".... and in the "Court of Society" MN parents have stacked the jury, subverted the evidence and paid off the judge. Most of us were well aware of these realities as kids. Another reason why I still believe the "Scapegoat" family member is the healthiest "member" in the FOO mess... generally, we're "the ones who got away" despite their continuing and relentless attempts to sabotage our efforts in every single way."  - Comment by Anonymous

Truth: Not only do they force us to submit to their abuse; they force us to pay attention to them when all we want to be is free of them! 

Malignant Narcissist Mother Sent Me A Christmas Greeting

It’s that special time of year again. Time of peace on earth and goodwill toward men. It’s also the time of year malignant narcissists across the land rear their ugly heads with intimidation and control tactics. It’s the time of the year the malignant narcissist’s fangs come out.  It’s the time of year the malignant narcissists ramp-up their bullying and abuse. It’s the time of year the greedy, scheming, thieving malignant narcissists work overtime to cover-up their crimes and vilify the whistleblower.

Christmas eve 2008, I discovered the malignant narcissist sister and malignant narcissist mother had been cyberstalking me and gaslighting me on ACON Blogs for over a year. When I telephoned MN sister to inquire about my discovery, she called the police on me, told them I was "mentally ill" and "violent" and that I "threatened" her and the MN mother. She told my dad I called her up crying asking for help. She told my neighbors that I was off "medication." Three different stories. I guess the lying bitch just couldn't make-up her mind which angle to work.

Fast forward to the present: Christmas 2016, I discover the malignant narcissist sister has stolen over one million dollars in assets from my late father’s estate. Yup, you read that right. The malignant narcissist sister has STOLEN over $1 million dollars from an estate that is to be divided equally 3 ways. This includes real estate, cash, and personal property. And that’s only what I know about! I suspect the grand total of the theft is much higher. What this means is she has given most of what should be in the pot to herself and screwed me and my brother out of our fair share. I also suspect she has floated the MN mother and MN flying Monkey large lumps of cash along with countless possessions from the estate. There is nothing left as far as my dad’s personal belongings go. She took it all. I got a big fat zero. And the money the MN witch didn’t steal she spent, and what she didn’t spend she squandered because she would much rather see funds go to waste then go to me. The bitch is a criminal and she has fucked with my future.  

So, in the midst of dealing with the cruel way the MN sister informed me of my father’s death (through a callously indifferent cold hearted low-life lawyer) and while I was coming to terms with the fact that I was not told that my dad had died until 9 days after the fact, and while I was in the process of still grieving the loss, I learn the malignant narcissist sister has stolen over $1 million dollars worth of assets from the estate and screwed me out of my inheritance.

Then my late father’s birthday rolled around. Then I met with a lawyer to decide what course of action to take against the MN sister and her organized crime ring. Then I leave the MN mother a few voicemail messages saying she must be so proud of her frankendaughter for abusing and exploiting a defenseless old man and stealing her sister and brother’s inheritance.  I also let the MN mother know that I am well aware that she is harboring stolen property; property that should form part of the estate and rightfully go to the beneficiaries (me and my brother). Letting that witch have it was worth breaking 26 years no contact.

The next night Coppers pounded on my door at 11:30pm and woke me up from my slumber. I was not surprised at all. I almost said, “What took you so long?"" and "You got the wrong guy. It's the little old granny who made the call that you want. She's housing stolen loot in the party room of her senior living complex, and her condo is a safe house for criminals.”

Yup, the malignant narcissist mother and MN sister called the cops on me for getting upset about their million dollars plus heist. So just like 8 years ago when they called the cops on me because I caught them in the process of criminally harassing me; they called the police on me because I caught them looting my dad’s estate. Typical fucking MN criminals. The Coppers told me that the MNs didn't want me to communicate with them, including through third parties. I said, "You mean like the way they are now communicating with me through a third-party?" Typical idiotic MN projection machines.

I let the coppers know what the MN mother and sister are all about and I went back to bed. Nothing surprises me anymore when it comes to those two. The malignant narcissist hags framing me as the bad guy to take the heat off themselves is standard fare. They are absolutely delusional to think they will get away with it. But malignant narcissists truly believe they can transgress others in every conceivable way with immunity.  We’ll see about that. The last message I left to the MN mother was, “See you in court, bitches!” The fight to expose the malignant narcissists is now taking place in the arena of real life. I tell ya, the second book I’m working on is writing itself.

Speaking of books, you can purchase a copy of Breaking Free paperback HERE and the House of Mirrors e-books HERE and HERE . 

And please know that for every book purchased a malignant narcissist receives a metaphorical brick through their window. 

                                                                  

The Sociopath Takes What Doesn't Belong to Her

I write you this letter to explain something to you. You have a serious personality disorder whose very symptoms, paradoxically, may leave you unaware that you have it.

Or, you may be “aware” of your disorder in an “intellectual” sense but consequent to your disorder, you lack appropriate alarm and shame over its expression.

People who do not have your disorder, if they were told they had it (and of its nature), would feel extremely unnerved and shamed to hear this feedback.

You, on the other hand, neither feel nor react with expected levels of uneasiness to learn of your disorder. Your reactions, expressing either calm indifference, an attitude of smug superiority or, alternatively, extreme irritation and indignation, add credence to the diagnosis.

You were probably not “born” with this disorder, but it’s also probable that you brought a biological tendency to it whose eventual emergence your upbringing probably encouraged or elicited.

Your disorder is called a number of different names that can be confusing, among them sociopath, psychopath, antisocial personality disorder, malignant narcissist, and more informal names. Although there may be some useful distinctions between these terms, the confusion they produce probably exceeds the usefulness of these distinctions.

More important are the common elements between them which describe a similar phenomenon – a human being like yourself who, while intellectually aware of common standards and laws of “right and wrong,” nonetheless grossly, chronically violates the boundaries and integrity of others with deficient remorse, deficient empathy, a deficient sense of accountability and, typically, with an attitude of contempt, or indifference towards the experiences and suffering of those you’ve violated.

You might recognize yourself in this description, but you may not. If you do, as I’ve suggested, your recognition of yourself as having this disorder will not produce an appropriate response.

But if you don’t recognize yourself from this description it’s likely to be a function of more than just your denial. Rather, your failure to see yourself, truly, as a sociopath probably reflects to an extent, an aforementioned feature of your disorder: I refer again to your deficient empathy as a consequence of which you are actually incapable of feeling more than superficial, transient concerns about, and remorse for your hurtful impact on others.

It is possible that hurting others is a primary goal but it’s also likely hurting others is a byproduct of your primary aim (and lifelong pattern) of taking something from others that doesn’t belong to you.

In other words, you may or may not intentionally seek to hurt others, but in either case your condition leaves you depleted of normal, inhibiting levels of compassion, sympathy and empathy towards others.

Your disorder has other essential features. The reason you can take from people, steal from them – their property, possessions, money, their dignity, sometimes their lives – and suffer so negligibly, if at all from your abuse of them, is that you do not respect them.

Your condition fundamentally leaves you with a characterological disrespect of others.

You view the world as a competition ground for gratification. People around you are thus players in this metaphorical drama; players from whom your principle inclination is to take, cajole, exploit and manipulate whatever it is that will leave you, not them, in a more comfortable, satiated condition.

You feel that your gratification – your present security, status, satisfaction and entertainment – takes precedence over everyone else’s. Your gratification is simply more important than anything else.

In your mind, you are entitled to the gratification you seek – in whatever forms you presently seek it – even when it costs others a great deal of pain towards which, as we’ve established, you bring a disordered lack of empathy and concern. This is a very twisted notion – specifically, the conviction that your gratification and its pursuit are virtually your inalienable right – a notion that supports the rationalizing of the chronic expression of your abusive, exploitative attitudes and behaviors towards others.

Finally, this makes you, your organized Crime Ring, and any accomplice who carries-out your “assaults” a remorseless violator of innocent people.

In an effort to put a stop to your destructive acts and mitigate injury to others, I am willing to get you help for your severe mental problems.

I have booked you an appointment at the department of criminal psychology at UBC for a formal “diagnosis”, but as you may or may not know, your disorder is notoriously unamenable to known “treatments." 

A more viable option to protect others from your criminal behavior and escalating psychological violence is for you, and your partners in crime, to live out the rest of your miserable days in a cage.  

I will continue to pursue every opportunity available to make sure this happens. 

Source: Steve Becker

The Narcissist is a Snoop, Spy, Busybody and Gossip

For people who are incredibly self-obsessed, narcissists are very nosy about others. But theirs is not an idle curiosity; it’s the instinct of a predator. Narcissists are habitual snoops, spies, busybodies and gossips. They are always trying to dig up dirt that they can use to frame, blackmail, hurt and humiliate others. They will use information, any information they have on you to come between the things and people you love. 

To enjoy this article and many more... 

                                                Purchase a copy of the new eBook!

         Breaking Free: A Way Out for Adult Children of Narcissists

                                                                  

Marilyn Tompkins IS The Look of Malignant Narcissism

Talk about snake eyes!

Talk about a smirk!

This hag's name is Marilyn Tompkins and she is a vile MALIGNANT NARCISSIST.

The Witch is filled with nothing but sheer MALICE.

Years ago this crazy vengeful HAG orchestrated a vicious mobbing of me in the building where I lived. And if that wasn't enough, she filed a false police report on me when I was out of town.

Why? Because I exercised my rights as a tenant. That, and it was a typical malignant narcissist smear campaign and character assassination because I was on to her and her thug husband.

I am in receipt of the police report she filed on me and pathological lies don't come close to describing her work of fiction. She's utterly insane. She's also broken the law and is guilty of public mischief.

Next to my vindictive, liar of a malignant narcissist sister Colleen (who she colluded with), she and her flying monkey husband (Ted Tompkins) are the most dangerous predators I have ever encountered in my life. Dangerous, because they are STUPID... stupid and mentally deranged enough to think the rules don't apply to them.

Think: down river banjo pickin' inbreds from Deliverance country.

NOT SAFE FOR EYEBALLS WARNING!

Behold a full frontal of  the repugnant Marilyn Tompkins. What an ugly little gargoyle! HIDEOUS!

Separated at birth...

Narcissist Sympathizers

Narcissist Sympathizers

By Kathy Krajco

What Makes Narcissists Tick

I, for one, am sick of the insult to our intelligence in narcissist sympathizers trying to hand people the line that the poor, poor narcissist doesn't mean to hurt anyone, that they don't know what they are doing, that it just sort of happens, that they think they are behaving normally.

Your brain must be dead if you think that people who abuse ONLY ON THE SLY - behaving like angels when there are witnesses - don't know exactly what they're doing.

To the bullet-headed narcissist sympathizers, I say, "Try real, real hard to understand. Bend a brain cell or two. Repeat to yourself 100 times that "He abuses only in the dark. When other people are watching, he acts like he's full of loving kindness even toward the very one he abuses in the dark."

Maybe if you repeat that simple fact to yourself 100 times, it will sink in. Think. Think real, real hard what it means. Really work at lifting that mental weight. Come on, you can do it. If you try real, real hard you will understand what this simple fact means.

Circumcize your crusty brain, because the average ten-year-old knows that if you hide what you are doing, you know what you are doing and that it's wrong.

Especially when you go to great lengths putting on a phony show of being the exact opposite type of person.

Get a clue: that ain't mental illness; that's just diabolical.

What's more, even the average ten year-old is smart enough to know that if you can control yourself when there are witnesses, you can control yourself when there aren't.

Too complex? Read my lips: that ain't mental illness; that's just sneakiness to get away with wrongdoing.

Sorry, but if you narcissist sympathizers can't see that, no one can enlighten you.

What's more, narcissists are sadistic. The well-known narcissist Sam Vaknin himself often says this. And anyone abused by a narcissist knows it.

Sadism is proof positive of the intent to cause pain.

It is also proof positive of the ability to empathize when the narcissist or psychopath wants to. Unfortunately, the only time they choose to empathize is when calculating what to do to cause maximum pain. You know - the empathy of a professional torturer, used only to feel out what type of treatment will wound most deeply.

The courts know all this too. Psychopaths (who are all narcissists too) and other narcissists flunk with flying colors all the insanity tests. Which is why NPD and psychopathy are no defense and are considered character disorders, not personality disorders.

And the mental health establishment has no credibility on the question, since they call cigarette smoking a mental illness and called homosexuality a mental illness till the day the politically correct wind shifted. How can anyone respect the judgement of a herd like that?

While I won't argue that NPD isn't a mental illness, I see that, if it is, it is far more likely the fruit of thoroughly depraved character, not the cause.

If you must twist your brain into a bowlful of tangled spaghetti to "rationalize" irrational and predatory behavior, you are going to end up with a damaged mind. But it's an EFFECT, not a cause, of vicious behavior.

But, go ahead, narcissist sympathizers. Insult your own intelligence all you want: it's a free country. Just don't expect anything but what you have coming for insulting mine or anyone else's.

PURCHASE A COPY OF HOUSE OF MIRRORS EBOOK AND PAPERBACK HERE!