The Malignant Narcissist As Character Assassin

If you have been targeted by a malignant narcissist for serious abuse, be aware that the abuse includes character assassination – the annihilation of who you are as a person. Just as through murder a careful criminal leaves no witnesses, a malignant narcissist is careful to abuse on the sly and destroy the victim’s credibility in advance in order to “leave no witnesses.” Character assassination is the premeditated murder of the target’s image, their good name, their reputation and ultimately their life.   

It takes extreme treachery to replace an authentic self with a false image of that person, and who is better skilled to do that than a sneaky malignant narcissist. Take a look at their lives; who they appear to be and who they really are. They don’t connect with reality. They live in a fictitious world of smoke and mirrors where appearances are all that matter. Narcissists only identify with their false image and they expect you to identify with the false image they invent of you. They NEED you to appear to the world the way they NEED you to be. It's your life according to the narcissist's script.

As Kathy Krajco wrote in her book “What Makes Narcissists Tick”:

Narcissists try to make you be what they say you are because, like a psychopath, they view you as an object, not as a human person with perceptions and a mind of your own. They view you as an extension of themselves (like a tool) to control. It is the moral equivalent of control a rapist thinks he has over the body of another, whom he views as but an object, and extension of himself, an executioner of his will. Psychologists call this bizarre behavior “projective identification,” a defense mechanism. The narcissist wants you to identify with the image he projects on you. You are a mirror to reflect his fantasy, so he pressures you to behave as though it is real.

Okay… So there’s that. We are nothing but objects the malignant narcissist feels entitled to use abuse and exploit in any way they please. They use control tactics such as lies, slander, projection, triangulation etc. to create a false image of their target which is always about glorifying themselves and degrading the victim. BUT, they also have motive. They are very invested in the way the target behaves because they have something at stake: malignant narcissists are continually engaged in post abuse cover-up. The key word here is “behave.” Malignant narcissists don’t care what the target thinks or how they feel or who they really are. ALL people are just objects to the narcissist. The malignant narcissist only care what their target thinks and feels insofar as it affects their behavior. And they will do whatever it takes to pressure the target into behaving according to their script.

Like a physical rapist who attacks when there are no witnesses, the malignant narcissist carries-out violent psychological rape covertly. The target, being the victim of the crimes is an expert witness of the narcissist. The narcissist’s greatest fear is a credible witness - the target. So, just as a rapist may use intimidation, blackmail, gagging and threats to coerce the victim to silence; the narcissist abuser does the same. But when control tactics fail to silence the victim, the malignant narcissist goes in for the kill.  

Character assassination is the narcissist’s method of taking a hit out on the target. The idea is to stop the target from reporting the narcissist's crimes to the authorities. Stop the target from being taken seriously by the authorities. Stop the target from taking the stand and testifying. The target is the most credible character witness against the vile malignant narcissist and they know it, so they retaliate like angry vandals smashing-up the target's most precious possession – their character. Character assassination is punishment for unmasking the malignant narcissist and breaking the "no talk" rule. It’s about condemning the target to a life in prison for the crimes the narcissist commits. Character assassination is about scapegoating the target, so the target ends-up with the reputation and the life the malignant narcissist deserves. Character assassination is about DESTROYING the evidence; the credibility of their most damning witness - their main target(s).

I come from a family with 3 malignant narcissist abusers, so I know how they operate. I’ve been observing them in action since I slept in a crib. They ALL abuse on the sly. They ALL slander and discredit me behind my back. They ALL paint me as the “problem.” And they ALL play the victim. You better believe I’m a “problem” to the malignant narcissist mob. I have escaped solitary confinement of “no talk” prison and my mouth is running loose.  

If going no contact is akin to placing yourself in the witness protection program, then what I’ve experienced is like being framed for a crime I didn’t commit, going to prison, breaking out and being hunted with a target on my back. The malignant narcissists will stop at nothing to make their target (me) take the fall. Just as a criminal doesn’t want to do hard time, the malignant narcissist doesn’t want to face the hardcore reality of who they are. As a result, the fugitive of a MN cult is subjected to the same threat as any defector who escapes with a suitcase full of sensitive inside information that could bring down the regime. 

Character assassination, smear campaigns and vandalizing the target’s image are tactics used by the malignant narcissist to avoid public shame of the truth. The malignant narcissist is terrified of having their freedom taken away – their freedom to abuse and exploit others whenever the hell they want. They are complete frauds and are absolutely terrified of being exposed.

Why are they so scared? Because malignant narcissists rely on using, abusing and scapegoating others to feel superior. And feeling superior is the name of the game. If they were forced to acknowledge their debts and dependencies on others (even if their debts and dependencies are through maltreatment) they would no longer appear superior. The malignant narcissist would be completely humiliated if others knew their limitations – that in order to feel good and appear good, they must make others feel bad and look bad.  That’s a pretty pathetic existence. Not only that, they would likely be punished for exploiting others opportunistically. So, malignant narcissists cover their tracks, by becoming cunning and devious, concealing their true motives and actions as much as possible. This is where character assassination comes in. 

The ability to project an image is relied upon more than ever when the narcissist is close to being outwitted and exposed. At this stage, narcissists become completely deceptive and extremely treacherous in an attempt to sustain whatever dishonesty they are guilty of while not appearing to be dishonest.

If you have been on the receiving end of a malignant narcissist post-abuse cover-up/character assassination then you know this can create terrifyingly bizarre scenes that make you wonder if you are living a nightmare.  In fact, things can become so strange and surreal that if you were to try and explain what the narcissist just pulled-off, people would think you are tripping on psychedelic drugs. This is where I have to hand it to those crazy evil fucks; they create scenarios that are so inexplicable their victims are left tongue-tied. Malignant Narcissists will do whatever, and I mean whatever it takes to cover their tracks - including, inflicting MORE abuse on to the victim. In fact, the narcissist's post-abuse cover-up is always more destructive than the original crime. 

Who would believe a “sister” and “mother” would call the police and accuse their victim of doing to them the exact thing they are in the process of doing to her? Who would believe a sister would lie to police and state her innocent sister is schizophrenic and violent just to avoid the embarrassment of being outed a cyberstalker? Who would believe a sister would lie outrageously to authorities and destroy her innocent sister's reputation just to punish her for breaking the "NO TALK" rule of the MN asylum? Who would believe protesting the malignant narcissist’s viciousness, abuse and lies would drive the malignant narcissist cult to even more extreme acts of brutality to dis-empower and silence the victim? For example, the MN sister is given access by the MN father to clean-out her sister’s bank account so she has no money and is forced to endure severe financial stress that’s piled onto to the stress of her trying to obtain employment with a massive road block the malignant narcissist intentionally laid with her calculated slander; slander that was also spread to the victim’s neighbors that resulted in the victim’s home environment being unsafe which forced her to have to pack-up and move. That’s an example of how malignant narcissists use the weight of mounting pressure to try and break the victim’s back. It’s called intentional infliction of emotional distress and it's designed to kill, or, at the very least, render the victim neutralized and to mentally and physically weak to fight back. 

The severity of the malignant narcissist’s crime is of no significance to the MN. Whether they get CAUGHT lying to police or snooping through your sock drawer, the gaslighting and cruelties they inflict to try and silence the witness never match the crimes they are in the process of covering-up. In the malignant narcissist’s eyes, the victim is expendable. For example, the malignant narcissist mother doesn’t give a damn if she destroys her daughter’s life to the point where she ends up destitute and living on the streets, just as long as people never “believe” what the daughter says about her being a bad mother. See what I’m saying? Their maliciousness reaches delusional proportions as they become obsessed with protecting their false image and ruining the victim so they can remain superior... and triumph. It's very important for the malignant narcissist to WIN at all costs.    

Character assassination destroys careers, marriages, and relationships, isolating the victim “to the desert” of humankind. Except for the fortunate who have independent means, it’s usually a trip down Skid Row, with one ramification after another barring every way out and relentlessly crushing and hammering the victim into ---- guess what? Exactly what their assassin says they are. This is where rag pickers and bag ladies and suicides come from. The victim will ask why he bothered to be a good person when what a person is isn’t up to him --- when it’s up to whatever others choose to make of him. --- “What Makes Narcissists Tick”

The malignant narcissist degrades and humiliates others, trashes good names, maligns strong character and ruins reputations because there is a huge pay off for them - protection/cover-up/conspiracy of silence. They will stop at nothing to obstruct the whistleblower from outing their morally repugnant, debauched, and parasitic existence. 

Bottom Line:  If you cannot drop off the grid, go into the no contact witness protection program or lay low then the malignant narcissist better fear you, or you better have some kind of power. Because if you decide to fight back, clear your name and expose the narcissist cult you can expect to be under attack from all sides: finances, career/job, home, relationships, reputation, children etc. It’s unrelenting and it often ends in marginalization of the victim.

For those of you who aren’t convinced of the malignant narcissist’s wrath when it comes to loss of control over their false image and their victim, you might want to ask the question “How exactly did Kathy Krajco die?”

Kathy Krajco, ACON blogger and author of “What Makes Narcissists Tick” wrote under her real name, and she wrote extensively about her abusive malignant narcissist father and sister. Kathy’s mother died in 1992, and her father died in 2004. So by the time she was blogging about malignant narcissism both her parents had passed away.

According to Kathy’s blog, her sister Terese was gainfully employed as a teacher, but lived at home with her parents her entire life. From what I gather, she mooched off her parents while hoarding her own money and even ended up manipulating the MN father into disinheriting Kathy. Kathy was also a teacher and I suspect she was a target of a career smear campaign orchestrated by Terese. Throughout Kathy’s blog and book there are numerous accounts of Terese’s bullying and abuse. For example, Kathy had a heart condition and one day Terese, who lived across the street, hired a snow plow guy to block Kathy’s driveway with snow. This meant that Kathy would have to go out and shovel in order to get her car out of the driveway. It’s would appear that Terese wanted to induce a heart attack in Kathy. Only a malignant narcissist could dream-up a scheme like that.

Kathy died unexpectedly in her home on May 9, 2008. She was 56 years old. Her sister Terese was the one who discovered her body. After Kathy died, her blog started being mysteriously dismantled. The only way that could happen is if someone had access to it. I know from experience, that I can leave my blog sitting around dormant for months without it being tampered.

I remember when I read online that Kathy had died, I cried. It was a huge loss to the ACON blogging community. And for years it bothered me that this brave woman who championed for the victims of narcissistic abuse was taken from this world, while an evil malignant narcissist (her sister) lived on.

Anna V of Narcissists Suck blog ordered Kathy’s death certificate to find out the cause of death. There didn’t appear to be anything suspicious in the report. Apparently Kathy died of natural causes – her heart may have given out.

Despite this information, there has always been a part of me that was left speculating whether or not Kathy’s sister played a hand in her death. Perhaps it’s because I have a malignant narcissist sister who is capable of anything, and wants to obliterate me for breaking the “no talk” rule. I have witnessed how out of control a malignant narcissist can become when they lose even an inch of control over their target and their precious image.

A couple of months ago my curiosity got the better of me and I read Kathy’s online obituary and Googled her sister’s name. What I discovered is this: Terese Krajco retired from teaching in 2012, and died in her home 5 years to the day that her sister Kathy died. I find it significant that Terese Krajco died on the anniversary of Kathy’s death.

Unlike Kathy’s obit that stated she died “unexpectedly,” Terese Krajco’s obit simply said she died alone at home on May 9, 2013 at the age of 59.

Is the date of Terese Krajco’s death a coincidence or an indication of a disturbed personality carrying out a ritualistic act? Did Terese assassinate Kathy? Did repressed guilt and shame finally surface to the conscience of a malignant narcissist and prompt her to off herself? Or, was she just fresh out of narc supply and saw no reason to carry on? I don’t know, but I know this:

I know if I were to die “unexpectedly” and under "suspicious" circumstances, I would want my sister to be a person of interest and be thoroughly investigated. The bitch is totally capable of murder. Or at least, hiring a thug to do it for her. 

I’m living proof (no pun intended) that my malignant narcissist sister is capable of character assassination which is just as violent, if not crueler than a physical assassination.