Sunday 3 November 2013

Why We Should Expose Narcissists




Malignant narcissism is a dark subject. And blogging about it is intense.


It takes going to an uncomfortable place to find my rage. It requires mental and emotional face time with bad memories. And in the case of this blogger, it's requires embracing my own darkness: my unadulterated hatred of what passes as human. If this seems extreme to you then you've probably never stared into the dead eyes of a smirking malignant narcissist.

Blogging about narcissism and the more malignant variety isn't just about the writing. It's also about the reading. The interacting. It's about the environment where we are "free" to express our truth. And it's about maintaining that freedom by keeping watch over our environment and fighting for our convictions. It's a battle in the real and online world.

Hey Narcs, you stop lying about me and I'll stop telling the TRUTH about you.

The bull-shit never ends.

I'm not done exposing them... doubt I ever will be. I can't just switch my bull-shit detector to "off." It doesn't work that way. It's not about  "healing" or "recovering" from N abuse and then becoming complaisant. Now wouldn't the narcissists love that? For all of us to miraculously "heal" from their atrocities - Hallelujah! - and fade away into the background. That must mean you're "well", right? When you are no longer outraged by injustice.

As long as there is a personality disordered abuser or some other unspecified fuckhead getting all up in my grill in real life or online, I will challenge them. It's the narcissist’s nature to harm others and it's my nature to go after bullies. My desire to speak the truth, my truth, will remain long after I stop blogging. It's my passion.

I tell you this because I am damn sick and tired of people labeling truthful blogs, vulnerability, authenticity and righteous anger as a sign of weakness or being "stuck", or not "healed" or not "recovering" or "playing the victim" or being "vengeful" ... blah de blah blah. Does it ever occur to this pinhead that maybe some people are natural fighters, truth tellers and supporters and that’s why they're writing about this stuff? Does it ever occur to these scaredy cats that these bloggers and commenters are brave? Airing so-called "dirty laundry" is about exposing the nuances of abuse. It's about participating in a dialogue and keeping the information on narcissists alive and out there? Does it ever occur to these "silencers" that the movement to expose the pathologicals among us is bigger than the sum of its parts? When people march in a rally are they doing it just for themselves? No. They're doing it for the cause, the greater good. I know all of this sounds idealistic. But frankly, I don't know where the hell I would be if it weren't for the brave souls who first took to the net to carve the way. A difference is being made. For me, blogging on this subject is about activism.

You're either part of the problem or part of the solution. So what's the solution? So much exposure that being able to spot a narcissist and run like hell before they bite becomes second nature to all. And if you can't run before they harm you, you expose their sorry ass because it's the societal "norm" to do so. I look forward to the day when emotional abuse is considered a crime punishable by law.