Wednesday, 24 April 2013

Malignant Narcissists Are Homicidal

How can they be evil and not designated as criminals? The Key lies in the word “designated.” They are criminals in that they commit “crimes” against life and liveliness. But except in rare instances – such as the case of a Hitler – when they might achieve extraordinary degrees of political power that remove them from ordinary restraints, their “crimes” are so subtle and covert that they cannot be designated as crimes.

               The Malignant Narcissist as described by M. Scott Peck in People of The Lie

My very first post on House of Mirrors was The Malignant Narcissist: Death Personified. I will never waver from this belief: that everything that characterizes the malignant narcissist is about killing life. I recognize that at the heart of my malignant narcissist mother, malignant narcissist sister and any other malignant narcissist lives a murderous criminal. One who is fully conscious that their deeds are morally repugnant, but choose to do them anyway.
The malignant narcissist is well aware that a moral code of right and wrong exists – they just don’t believe it applies to them. They place themselves above the laws of universal morality, thereby justifying their crimes and making them exempt from judgement. Haven’t you heard? Malignant Narcissists are superior beings, and as superiors beings they don’t follow any rules; they write their own and the inevitable result is corruption. The malignant narcissist’s "amoral" code is based on sucking in every single human resource toward them and blocking it all from you. The malignant narcissist’s morality is based on positioning themselves as gods that deserve it all, and placing you beneath them as a big fat zero who deserves nothing.

Nice, huh? What do you expect from a mentally deranged creature with a retarded conscience and lack of empathy? MALIGNANT NARCISSISTS ARE MORALLY INSANE. In their lying eyes they are better than you, they are above you, and only their laws apply: laws that protect them; laws that excuse them; laws that give them all the rights and you none. Indeed, the malignant narcissist makes up the laws of morality on the fly so they always end up on top as the gods they are, and you always end up beneath them as the worthless nothing they believe you to be. And if you dare question the one-sided standards of a MN god you will face their vengeful wrath.  Or, they’ll just say “No I didn’t” or “Get over it” – calling YOUR behavior into question because you refused to obey the law of acting like it never happened. Or, they’ll just make something up – the malignant narcissist conjures up morality and reality as they go.
Check it: the malignant narcissist flat out denies there is an objective morality that stands outside them and judges them. The malignant narcissist denies that anything outside of them holds any value; not ethics, integrity, convictions, justice and certainly not you. The zero valuation of others and their contempt for morality and reality is what makes malignant narcissists capable of the basest crimes against humanity; it’s what makes them extremely dangerous. It’s what you need to believe to be true so you will never have anything to do with them again.

I fully acknowledge the murderer that lives in the heart of my mother and sister. They may lack the power of a tyrant, or the motivation of a serial killer but the root of malignant narcissism contaminates them just the same. They are no less evil than noteworthy evil people. My MN mother and MN sister may not be capable of hurting humanity on a large scale, but they exercise the murderer within by slaking their lusts in the family dictatorship.  In the family dictatorship, the malignant narcissist lacks accountability and has no fear of the law. Indeed, in the family dictatorship, the MN writes the law.
For example, my malignant narcissist sister could easily get away with murder within the confines of the MN family system, and she did get away with attempted murder – she tried to kill me as a kid by strangling me to the point of near unconsciousness and trapping me in front of an oncoming car. The only reason I lived is because the car came to a screeching halt. However, if MN sister tried to pull that same stunt with some random kid in public school there would be hell to pay. She would be held accountable, disciplined and likely expelled and labelled a psycho. In other words, MN sister could commit murder without consequence in a morally insane environment like a MN family, but she was restrained from homicidal activity in public school because of societal norms, punishment and the law.

Malignant narcissists don’t give a shit about the law, the rules, limits or you. The only thing that has the power to restrain their physical violence is the constraints of their circumstances, their FEAR of exposure, their fear of the law, and their fear of what people might think. The malignant narcissist is afraid of getting busted. So how does the malignant narcissist go about satiating her murderous impulses without getting caught?
Some of them use their psychological slaves to carry-out murder. Think: the femme fatale who convinces her lover to shoot her husband. That type of MN has two kills on the go: one is her psychological slave that she is slowly killing by eroding his identity and sanity and then stealing his freedom and his life by making him guilty of a prison sentence. The other, is the dead husband. That’s two dead men and not a hair out of place.

Though many malignant narcissists are capable of orchestrating a homicide, most just stick to covert psychological murder. Covert psychological murder leaves no evidence and no one has ever been convicted of it. In fact, covert psychological murder is the fall back murder for those MNs who are not as strong as their target or lack physical access to their target. It’s also the murder of choice for those MNs like my mother who have never developed a taste for blood and are very concerned about outward appearances.

But here’s the thing about covert psychological murder: NOTHING is stopping the malignant narcissist from killing someone psychologically. Nothing. Physical violence is tangible – you can see it. A homicidal maniac is out there in the open for all to see leaving blood, bruises and broken bones, and if there are witnesses present they can pull the killer off the victim. With a covert psychological murderer the victim often has no proof they are being attacked. In fact, the victim often isn’t aware that it is happening. Some of the most severe psychological violence happens in plain sight and that’s what makes it so insidious.
Gaslighting, mind games, brainwashing, manipulation, torment, domination, subjugation, ostracizing, isolating, lies, slander and gossip are just some weapons of psychological murder. They don’t call it character “assassination” for nothing. And driving someone crazy or to self-destructive acts or suicide is about as close to killing the person as if you shot them dead. Covert psychological murder is the invisible intravenous feed of poison that kills a person’s spirit. I believe that our souls are our consciousness, and wiping out a person’s individual consciousness and turning them into a zombie that is unable to think, feel, or be is the same thing as death.

And that is how it all begins: the malignant narcissist attempts to convince someone who is conscious of their secrets, lies and immorality that they are crazy and proceeds to annihilate them in order to keep them quiet. The more the victims resists, the more severe the mental abuse becomes.

One of my earliest memories of MN mother is her getting off on psychologically torturing me by locking me in a room with a rat (RAT STORY HERE). I was aware of her unbelievably deviant and shallow nature at an early age and as a result she has been trying to covertly psychologically murder me ever since.
killing a person’s confidence, perceptions, esteem, sensitivities, reputation and sense of self is manipulating that person into believing they are worthless. When you annihilate the qualities that amount to an human BEING, you murder that person’s soul and erase their liveliness. My malignant narcissist mother’s lust for killing was not limited to SOUL MURDER; she actually wanted me to commit suicide. And she attempted to drive me to suicide by using the “power of suggestion” to plant the thought in my mind. If the power of suggestion is a success then the person who you planted the thought in, actually believes that the idea is theirs. The first time MN mother tried to use the power of suggestion on me to commit suicide I was a teenager.  About 25 years later, and after 17 years of no contact with her, she used MN sister to plant the same suicide thought in my head. You can read about that in YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO LIVE.  

Malignant narcissist mother has groomed MN sister in the black art of psychological murder and I must confess she is more dangerous than her master because she is smarter and more blood thirsty. She is a sadist who is entirely capable of physically killing me, poisoning me, running me down in her car, pushing me off a cliff, manipulating her flying monkey into shooting me – you name it and she’s got the MN parents who will cover-up her crimes against me no questions asked. But she’s a shut-in who doesn’t leave her house and I won’t go near the crazy bitch, so her options are limited.  All she can do now is assassinate my character… and that she does.
MN sister does however continue to murder N father psychologically. She uses her own hysteria to create fear and worry in his mind for his health and safety which makes him dependent on her for guidance, and she guides him to give her power, control and all his assets. The last time I spoke with her, about 5 years ago, she giggled and said “It’s so easy to use the power of suggestion on dad.”

Then there’s the MN bitch’s Flying Monkey “Lloyd” who is her psychological slave. She barks order, and leads him around by his monkey tail. She has succeeded in taking his psychological freedom away and he is under her deadly control. From what I gather, there isn’t much left of him mentally.  
Every motivation of the malignant narcissist is about killing life and liveliness. There is nothing life giving or life enhancing about them. Even if a MN births a life, she just uses it as a host to parasitize. And although these homicidal monsters are not designated criminals, they are in fact worse because they elect to switch off morality in their own home: the place where they know they can get away with their evil deeds. And unlike your average criminal their crimes against humanity are not random; they select those near and dear who place their trust in them to systematically murder.   

Families governed by malignant narcissist parents have often been referred to as “god’s concentration camps.” I believe this to be an accurate description. The normal children of these concentration camps are at the mercy of powerful, life destroying tyrants who operate in a secretive and closed environment where they are free to remove themselves from ordinary restraints of human decency. That’s why I believe the last “sacred” institution known as family is so dangerous. The “family” structure becomes like shackles that can be taken to injustice, and that’s precisely what happens when malignant narcissists are in charge – they get away with murder.  Home sweet homicide.


Anonymous said...

Thank-you so much lisette,for this awesome blog. I
really did not know there was a name for this sort of evil.

Anonymous said...

You won't believe it but I laughed when I read this post. I can't believe you have 'phrased' the horrendous truth that ones kith and kin sit and plot to kill their own kind. Can you imagine a wolf pack doing something like that, killing off the ones most likely to enable their survival, that's just a deformed way of thinking, it's unnatural, above all it's stupid.

My mother used to sit with evil bitch sister and discuss 'the scapegoat of the days' death and how they could bring that about, I used to hear them, as a child, talking about injecting someones fruit with noxious poison, setting fire to their house, blowing up their cars (which my sister did to her first ex husband). I cant believe that this became common place discussion EVERY Christmas lunch, the victim was usually in the same room. I used to be fascinated by the sheer unnaturalness of this. I am still flabbergasted. They just give me a headache.

After I went no contact I was the homicidal subject for a long time, my brothers girlfriend came over to my house one day sobbing her heart clean out of her chest, utterly distressed, that evil mother and evil sister had laughed all day about bringing about my murder. Seriously, just how screwed in the head do you have to be as a mother to rejoice in your daughters pending murder. And she never thought that I would have a problem with that, a problem with the discussion of my own friggin MURDER!!! What has to happen to someone for that to become not only normal, but almost sanctioned thought patterns. The truth is, and this is why I laughed when I read your post that after many many years of no contact I still expect the retarded horror to jump out and try to hurt me. And all for being, as you appear to be Lisette, a truth teller. And not even a vocal truth teller just someone who instinctively knows that they are cruds of people, thats all the MN needs to know is that you KNOW what they are, you don't even have to open your mouth.

Sometimes I think evil is too strong a word for them, it is kind of a powerful word, in a negative way, I dont think they are powerful, for either good or bad, I just think they are chumps, dupes, buffoons, wacky, inept, inane, silly and idiotic, almost slapsticky. If we were studying their kind from another planet (I use that example to envision perspective) we would think they were just bloody clowns, shitting where they eat type of people, even earthworms don't do that. The earthworm has out evolved them, that's not powerful, its pathetic.

Your truthfulness is so healing.

Anonymous said...

"she is more dangerous than her master" Interesting thing is that each generation is seemingly worse than the previous.

Lisette said...

"Sometimes I think evil is too strong a word for them, it is kind of a powerful word, in a negative way, I dont think they are powerful, for either good or bad, I just think they are chumps, dupes, buffoons, wacky, inept, inane, silly and idiotic, almost slapsticky."

You think evil is too powerful a word for them in a negative way and you think they are just silly and idiotic? Then you probably don't belong here. My entire blog is devoted to naming malignant narcissists evil because that exactly what they are. I don't believe the word evil or evil people should be treated as a taboo subject. Being direct about who and what they are disempowers them. That's why I make my posts so blunt: MNs are Homicidal. Yes, it's kind of funny because telling the truth blatantly is kind of naughty. Being all hush hush about them and the word evil, empowers them and keeps the truth hidden. I hope one day there is worldwide acceptance of the existence of evil. And when that time rolls around, that's when these evil fuckers will be scared. Right now people are afraid to use the word and instead opt to explain away and excuse evil. Evil relies on this worldwide cover-up and they are laughing at us all the way to hell.

Also, if you've ever been at the receiving end of covert psychological murder you would find the malignant narcissist far from "slapsticky." Malignant narcissists are sinister and capable of the most heinous crimes against humanity, and they can get away with them because they are so sly, so calculating, so cunning and covert.

Over the course of a year, I had 4 malignant narcissists try and psychologically murder me. This involved gaslighting, stalking, invasion of privacy, being ostracized, and at the receiving end of incredible lies, slander and a smear campaign. Interestingly, all 4 of the MNs - though they didn't know each other - attacked me all at once, when I was most physically and psychologically vulnerable: I was in a state of shock from a bad accident and post surgery when - BAM! Hit from all sides. I was not psychologically murdered, but I was psychologically injured and I ended up in the hospital. There was nothing silly about my MN mother and MN sister sinking their sharpest fangs into me when I was in the weakest physical and mental state of my life.

These pieces of shit have no rock bottom. I don't believe evil is a strong enough word for them.

Anonymous said...

"NOTHING is stopping the malignant narcissist from killing someone psychologically. Nothing. Physical violence is tangible – you can see it. A homicidal maniac is out there in the open for all to see leaving blood, bruises and broken bones, and if there are witnesses present they can pull the killer off the victim. With a covert psychological murderer the victim often has no proof they are being attacked. In fact, the victim often isn’t aware that it is happening. Some of the most severe psychological violence happens in plain sight and that’s what makes it so insidious."
Boy did you nail it right here, and this is what makes this monsters so dangerous. Evilb sucked the soul right out of me while I was growing up, leaving me as nothing more than an empty body just walking around going through the motions of life. This bitch stole my ability to think; my ability to feel happiness, and my very will to live. What other kid would be contemplating suicide to a point of creating a plan at the age of 9 or 10?

The worst part is that no one knew she was doing, and I couldn't explain it to anyone - If I even tried, I'd be shut down with, "Now you know your mother loves you." At the insistence of my school, she drug me to a couple of therapists feigning concern, but I couldn't explain it. I didn't even begin to figure it out that I had been mind-fucked my whole life until I was in my mid 20s!

"Also, if you've ever been at the receiving end of covert psychological murder you would find the malignant narcissist far from "slapsticky." Malignant narcissists are sinister and capable of the most heinous crimes against humanity, and they can get away with them because they are so sly, so calculating, so cunning and covert. "
Couldn't agree more...MN and "slapsticky" don't belong together, and if this an accurate description, I would have to guess that the disordered person must have something else going on.

Thanks for another great post!


Lisette said...

I don't deny that the MN's behavior is outrageous. The thing is, their outrageousness lands others in the ER, a psych ward, prison or an early grave. What is truly outrageous is that they get away with it.

Tundra Woman said...

IMO, the comment left by Anon above @05:21 indicates indeed, they already *are* residing on "another planet." Least there be no ambiguity, here's the dictionary definition of-
evil adj. 1 morally bad; wicked; 2 injurious, harmful; 3 disastrous, calamitous; 4 of ill repute
SYN adj wrong, depraved, corrupt, vicious
Get it NOW? If not, you haven't been on the receiving end of an MN homicidal family member. Lucky you. Many of us have and I can assure you, when it's YOUR life on the line it isn't "inept, inane, silly" or "idiotic." These adjectives are clearly descriptive of your own ignorance.
It's a miracle I wasn't toe-tagged by 3 and certainly by 13 courtesy of Psychobitch. She knew exactly what she was doing and did it intentionally, repeatedly and in a clearly targeted fashion. Nonetheless, they all attempt to systematically murder their children psychologically and in the cruelest manner often without leaving any overt manifestations least that child come to the attention of the authorities. When they're not beating you to death physically, they're beating you to death psychologically day in, day out. This is the consistent experience of a child with an MN "Parent" and/or "Sibling."
In my experience bruises fade, burns scar over, broken bones mend. It is the psychological homicide that leaves the longest legacy: There is nothing remotely "slapsticky" about that REALITY. Evil is not some abstract concept that excludes parents or siblings etc. and it's not gonna show up sporting a bad sunburn, horns, a long tail and a pitchfork-at least not on planet Earth.

Mike said...

Just found your site. From your experience, do you have guidance on your site on how to best protect my kids from my NPD/BPD wife? I have researched and put into practice many things but will never stop trying to learn and improve.

Elena K said...

Interestingly, despite her homicidal impulses, my malignant narcissist mother fully believes she is "good" - or at least *appears* to believe it. (more on this later) She works this by creating some bizarro "moral" code by which many things considered to be heinous are good. Child abuse? It's good - teaches those kids a lesson. Rape or other type of assault? Good - they must have done something to deserve it. Torture? Rounding people up and shooting them? All good, our country would be a better place if it did this more often. And dozens more examples like this. That's mom. She likes it, therefore it is morally righteous.

Conversely, should you say you believe in a more peaceable way of handling things - like, not committing genocide, for example - then you are the evil one. Evil with a capital E. She will get on the phone to everyone she knows and tell them how very evil you are....even if she has to make up a bunch of huge whopping lies* to make her story sound more believable.

Now, as I said, she *appears* to believe she's good, on the side of righteousness. She certainly talks like it, behaves like she believes it, though I suspect it's a thin cover for her sadism. This is how she justifies her glee at seeing people harmed or killed. She calls it justice, or says they deserved it, and somehow it reinforces her idea that's she's a shining example of righteousness. But whether she's actually lying to herself, or just lying to everyone else, I'm not sure. When confronted about it, she just goes weirdly blank, like her mind has snapped for a moment, before freaking the hell out with full-on narc rage. Yes, I believe she's capable of killing, either physically or psychologically. She came real close to fatally injuring me in childhood, and I do know that her first child - which she didn't want - died in infancy. No explanation was ever given, and I've always had questions in the back of my mind about it.

*The fact that she does make up outrageous stories to tarnish other people's names indicates she does know what she's doing. She must know that "my daughter is evil because she thinks genocide is wrong" won't fly with most people. She seems perfectly lucid when she's working a smear campaign. It's just the way she seems to disappear into some delusional never-never land when confronted with these things that makes me wonder what's going on in her mind. I'm in no way suggesting my mother is a typical MN. She seems to be less clever and more emotionally unstable/delusional than most. She's every bit as dangerous though.

Lisette said...

Mike, my blog is primarily for Adult Children of Narcissists. I really don't have any guidance on how to best protect your kids from their NPD/BPD mother. I would suggest that you continue to read the posts and comments and apply any useful information to your situation.

Tundra Woman said...

Elena, IMO, you nailed it. Anyone who identifies with the Aggressor, who manipulates evil into anything other than what it is whether through lies, re-writing history, covert or overt pontificating etc. demonstrates the ass-backwards responses typical of MNs.
The unceasing determined attempts at any cost-particularly to their Target-to cloak themselves in "Righteousness" in an effort to "Appear" what they are not indicates very clearly once again, they *do* know the difference: They chose to be what they are and they do revel in their sadism. This has been my experience as well, FWIW.

Lisette said...

"Your truthfulness is so healing."

Hey Anus, you are so full of shit! Oops. That was just word association - I meant Anonymous. Nah, Anus works.

Anus, I am in receipt of your other comments and have considered the content. Here's some adjectives to describe what I think of them and you: chump, dupe, buffoon, fool, inept, silly and idiotic.

This isn't a feeding ground for attention whoring narc trolls. Oh, and P.S. your writing style is off-putting.

That's right, I get the last word... not you.

Take a hike, clown!

q1605 said...

my mom tried to blame her shenanigans on my father and sister and in the end she almost pulled it off. If she could have taken some heat off her there would would have been no 'white" oleander epiphany at the end of the movie just wrongful convictions end I promise you she would have seen it through maybe my father would have strangled her in the courtroom an fhr might have been alive today.

Susan said...

I couldn't agree more Lisette that the Malignant Narcissist is all about killing life. These predators operate in the realm of the soul. And just like in the animal kingdom, certain predators are made to kill other animals, these people are made to kill souls and all life around them. My very own mother is a malignant narcissist and wherever she goes, destruction follows. I watched her all my life and her energy is so toxic that anything electronic, totally breaks down in her presence. The other day, she used my hair dryer (that had been working fine until then) and instantly the motor started going into smoke and making these weird noises and jammed. She would my dad's car, and the engine light would come on or something electronic would fizzle in her presence. Also, my mother always hated any displays of affection, love, joy or anything that would represent life. She would hate it when I'd hug my brother and tell him I loved him. She'd attack me for it and reprimand me if I bought him any gifts. It is my firm opinion that these Narcissists are born to destroy life. They represent DEATH. Wherever they go, darkness, depression and death ensues. They cloak themselves behind the role of family and that's where they wreak the most havoc. They are ruthless killers of souls, especially of their own flesh and blood. Humankind is made to live life with love and joy. Not them. These people are the exact opposite, made to destroy any semblance of life. Anyone who disagrees with this, has definitely never experienced or dealt with a malignant narcissist.

Lisette said...

"Susan" thank-you for paraphrasing my blog post. Well done.

I have to ask, if you believe malignant narcissists are made to kill souls and life all around them then why are you hanging-out with your MN mother? Do you keep her around for her superconducting energy charge, just in case the power goes out?

Susan said...

Lisette- I have gone NC with my MNM, it's been 1.5 years. I kept getting violently ill towards the end of our interaction, and that's when I realized, that I needed to go NC.

Susan said...

Lisette - Also, I reread my post and I did post "the other day, my mom used my hair dryer", which would make it seem I am in contact with her. I apologize, that is not accurate. That line should have read, "the other day, I recalled how she used my hairdryer...". Thanks.

q1605 said...

WE always need to be mindful of it being the little things that tell the true nature of their beast inside a parent . When a narc parent is demoralizing their child they let slip many tells that go right over their own heads not to mention the person they are dogging and who they are dogging you/us to you to. My mother would never cop to her criminal past but she would sometimes say thingsthat are a ded give away like someone must have dropped you on your head when you were a kid Ummm that would be you bitch. or some gene pool comment which is composed of half hers and an automatic indictment of hers. Or just about anything. Shit runs downhill bitch and I am on the downhill run from you. We are what they made us but they are too obtuse to see it that way. If someone gins out a serial killer they look at the mother first thing. Why not for anything else?

q1605 said...

Susan It's weird my mother said she does the same thing to electronics appliances and said she can't keep a watch because they fizzle out after a while. Luckily the bitch is dead now but I believed it growing up in her presence.

Anonymous said...

Great article Lisette! Lots of wisdom that I will reread often. As mother's day approaches, I notice I am thinking on some of these topics. Thank heavens I've been NC for 3 years, but the holiday still brings some ugly memories to the surface that need to be worked through. Too bad as kids we didn't have the training the military gives to the troops for 'in case you become a prisoner of war'. I think it would have been pretty useful for withstanding the mindfuck from the MNmom.

q1605 said...

"Your truthfulness is so healing." No murder has ever been committed by a Narcissist. Just ask one, they'll tell you.

Nyssa said...

When I first realized my ex-best friend was probably a narc, I thought he was a benign narc. But then I discovered he strangled his stepdaughter to unconsciousness (when she was 9), and that another time he beat her mercilessly (when she was small). Other actions he has taken since discovering my blog and that I wanted to be left alone at last, have shown him to be most likely MN--so I don't know why I still keep wishing he would make peace with us....I guess I keep getting pulled into the facade of friendship he showed me.

I suspect my brother of narcissism of some kind, as well. I'm not sure where he got it from, because all other members of my family (except for one aunt-by-marriage who has alienated everyone) seem normal, with ordinary faults. Years ago, I heard my mother say that he tried to kill me when I was a baby. He was always antagonistic to me, a bully in my own house, and never grew out of it, so I have minimal contact with him now. When he was in the military, and I was probably about 11, he strangled me for a few seconds, scaring me. He was the kind to laugh when TV bad guys pulled some nastiness. When my boyfriends met him, they, too, could see the bully in him. My husband noted once that whenever we visited my parents (with whom my brother still lives), my back/neck muscles tensed up. Even our mother calls him a bully.

I bet he's an MN, that I have fallen prey to narcissists at various times because of him....I hope that all this research into narcissism will help me recognize "them" *before* they target me again.

"And that is how it all begins: the malignant narcissist attempts to convince someone who is conscious of their secrets, lies and immorality that they are crazy and proceeds to annihilate them in order to keep them quiet. The more the victims resists, the more severe the mental abuse becomes."

This is certainly familiar. Sounds like my ex-best friend and his wife. I've gone into it in detail on my blog and don't wish to recount it here, but I've seen so much evidence of this crazy-making and mental abuse that my husband and I both believe them to be narcissists.

Lisette said...

Nyssa, I don't believe there is such thing as a "benign" narcissist. They all lack empathy and as a result have no capacity to genuinely care for another human being. For that reason, they are all toxic and harmful. Yes, I believe it's possible to have a very shallow, superficial relationship with a low level narc. They key is to keep it very superficial. If you expect them to behave as a normal person who is capable of relating to you, then you are doomed. As far as I'm concerned, it sucks to be around any narc. And don't expect any peaceful resolution with a malignant narcissist. They will never admit they are wrong, they show no remorse for their bad behavior and they truly believe they are above reproach. The best you can hope for is that they will go away and stay away. Or, when you go no contact they don't come after you. As for your brother, he could just be born "that way." Apparently, Jeffrey Dahmer's parents were normal. No one really knows what causes malignant narcissism.

Her object said...

Nothing is beyond them.

They poisoned the dogs after I left,systematic.
It was So sad my son hid the facts from me,then confessed.
Its like he could not deal with his mother and grandmother killing the dogs.
All 4 dogs were dead with in 2 years of my leaving,my dog first.
They all were bleeding from mouth.
Myself I could not go near house to get dogs.
By the time I found out how they died it was to late to press charges.
Malignant Narcissist will kill.

Vince Taylor said...

It's my guess it's the development of the nuclear family that has led to the current epidemic in child abuse from malignant narcissism. It's the closed nature of the modern family that ensures this evil continues. Pre industrial societies were close knit and the extended family was the norm and a high degree of oversight would have prevented malignant narcissists doing their evil. Also, the conditions that human beings evolved in was the tribal one for countless millenia and I imagine child abuse could not have occurred unnnoticed under such conditions with such a high degree of community interaction of its members. The group itself would've corrected its evil members. Of course understanding that reality doesn't solve the problem. The state can't start putting cameras in people's houses and so sadly it continues insulated behind closed doors.

jimmyp said...

Starting to understand, you've summed it up so well.
Many thanks

Marcos said...

Great article, you certainly have a grasp on this. You are right, there is no such thing as a benign narcissist, they are toxic - all of them. Also just wanted to let you know that I actually coined the term "covert psychological murder" myself back in 2011 in order to describe suicide as a result of narcissistic/sociopathic abuse.

Lisette said...

Marcos, looks like you didn't actually coin the term "covert psychological murder."

Attachment, Intimacy, Autonomy: Using Attachment Theory in ...
Jeremy Holmes - 1996 - ‎Psychology
As Bowlby (1988) pointed out, this covert psychological murder is highly dangerous if it remains unacknowledged, a death waiting to be enacted. As Winnicott .